T.M. Kayode

My mom is one of the best people you could ever meet.

I don’t say this just because she is my mom, but because I have watched her over the years and learned many important things. She has taught me about life, devotion to God, marriage, parenting, relationships, discipline, and work. She is my top role model and confidant, and I am very proud to be her daughter.

My mom is fair and loves justice. She is calm and peaceful, but do not mistake this for weakness, she has no reservation about putting silly people in their place. She keeps her promises and is very smart and observant.

As I look at my own actions, I see myself becoming more like her. Here are some things my mom does easily that amazed me when I was younger, and now I find myself doing them too.

Being the first to wake up and then having to wake everyone up:

Being the first to wake up and then having to wake everyone up was always my mom’s specialty. When I was younger, she got up early every morning to wake us for school or church. I’d hear her coming and wait until she knocked and called my name before I’d wake up. With her around, we didn’t need an alarm clock; she was always there to wake us up reliably. During exams, she was especially helpful—ask her to wake you for a midnight study session, and you can be sure she will not sleep off on you

Here’s a funny story: During one exam period, exhausted after school, I needed to study for the next day. I asked my mom to wake me at midnight. She finally woke me at 3 a.m. I was upset and worried, wondering how I’d cover all the material before school. I might have cried—I used to cry easily back then—asking why she hadn’t woken me earlier. She calmly said, “You were tired and needed rest to study effectively.” I thought she wanted me to fail! Nevertheless, I got to work right away; no time for tears—I could cry later if needed. Surprisingly, I finished in time and aced the exam. That day taught me a vital lesson: never underestimate the importance of sleep, no matter how urgent the task. If I’m exhausted, I prioritize sleep first, then tackle the tasks at hand.

I’ve written about my sleep strategy here, if you’re interested in checking it out.

Being the first to get ready and waiting for everyone else

Besides being the first one up, she’s always the first to get ready, patiently waiting in the parlour fully dressed, especially on Sundays. She sits calmly, legs crossed, while the rest of us scurry around. Before that, she makes sure everyone has hot water for their baths and tidies up the kitchen. She’s very organized and methodical, sticking to a set wake-up time and following her morning routine carefully.

 I’m still trying to match her morning organization—some days are better than others.

Loving Beans

When I was younger, I couldn’t understand why anyone would enjoy beans. It felt like a punishment meal to me. But my mom loves beans. Guess who loves beans now? The older they are, the better they taste. She never forced us to eat it; if we didn’t like what she cooked, we had two options: (1) go hungry or (2) make our own meal. Thankfully, she taught all of us—my siblings and me—to cook.

Rage Cleaning

I didn’t know what else to call this phenomenon, so let’s just call it “Rage cleaning.”

Let me explain: When my siblings and I were younger, around ages 12 to 20, there were times—putting it mildly—when we’d get so caught up in our own worlds that we’d neglect cleaning the house. In other words, we’d get lazy and let things slide.

Mom wouldn’t say much, but suddenly you’d hear the sounds of cleaning, things being shuffled around. We’d peek out from our rooms and see Mom cleaning the house. Now, you had two options: (1) Grab a broom and quietly join in the cleaning, or (2) Pretend to be asleep. If you were feeling mischievous, you might choose option two.

While she cleaned, Mom would be silent and focused on her task. You couldn’t even offer to help; she’d insist that she needed to do it herself, preparing for when we’d move out.

I find myself rage cleaning on many days too. Sometimes H asks me if I’m angry because of  the serious on my face. But I explain that I have a plan in my head for all the places I want to clean—I’m just focused, not angry. Smiling while cleaning takes extra energy that I’d rather put into getting things tidy.

Remembering Dates

My mom has an exceptional memory. She remembers birthdays not just of our family, but also of distant relatives and friends. Once you tell her your birthday, she never forgets. I remember how she would even remind me of my friends’ children’s birthdays. I used to envy that talent because I struggle with remembering birthdays. However, I’m making a conscious effort now. I’m trying harder to remember and be more intentional about it. I still have a ways to go, but I’m determined to improve.

These are just a few of the countless lessons I’ve learned from my mom over the years. Her wisdom, grace, and strength continue to shape who I am today. Do you have similar stories or lessons learned from your mom? I’d love to hear about them! Feel free to share your experiences in the comments below. Together, let’s celebrate the remarkable women who inspire and teach us every day.